Probably shouldn't have done that...

... because I'm very stiff and sore, and it feels like I have a slight case of whiplash.

What did I do to cause this? Why, I double-dog-dared myself to ride the Tanzanian Twister water slide at Kalahari, Wisconsin Dells. Better known as "the toilet."

 

First, you shoot feet-first down a very dark tube; then you whirl a couple of times around this gigantic bowl, then you get free-fall dumped into a pool that's over 9 feet deep. And as soon as you come up for air, you have to swim hard for the side while being pummeled by the continuous water flow from above.

I whanged my head pretty good when I got dumped into the bowl, but had enough brain cells still firing that I was able to take a deep breath and hold my nose before I went down the hole.

This ride should come with a free lifetime pass to your chiropractor of choice.  I can safely say I will never do it again.

But, given the opportunity, I will do the milder outdoor version, the Swahili Swirl, the one where you ride a tube/raft, and the final drop is down another chute into a shallow pool where you can exit your raft at some leisure. Best of all:  No whiplash!

What I want to know is, how did this person manage to come down the final chute facing front?  I went in backwards both times. Go figure.

Now I can cross "water park" off my bucket list.

And for all your lurkers, I'm back home now, so don't think you can rob my house while I'm out of state!

See? I Wasn't Lying.

This truck came to address the septic tank issues at the late parental residence, and naturally I took the opportunity to take a picture.

Speaking of the late parental residence, we closed yesterday, the new owners have the keys, and y'all missed out on the perfect opportunity to own a chunk of real estate in beautiful Carmel Valley.

And I do believe I'm going to sleep for about a week now.

This Is Why There's Algebra.

No, I haven't dropped off the face of the earth. Just been really, really busy. Being the executor/trustee of your parents' estate can do that to a person. (Mother just faded away at age 91 back in December.)

Which reminds me. I don't care how old (or young) you are. Do your heirs a favor, and thin out your stuff NOW. If you can't figure out why that's a good thing, ask me about filling the biggest dumpster Waste Management will deliver, and still having trash left over. Not to mention so many trips to Goodwill, the guy at the donation station knows us by name.

Oh, and does anybody want to buy a 2000+ square foot house on an acre in Carmel Valley? A million in cash and it's yours.

None of which explains the algebra.

For reasons I'm too tired to explain right now, amongst my various other endeavors I am experimenting with creating handmade flutes. And before I (pun warning!) branch out into wood, bamboo and other such materials, PVC pipe is a good place to start.

Yep. Good ol' PVC pipe from Home Depot, at less than 2 bucks for 10 feet of the stuff.

Anybody can just start drilling holes in a tube, but if you want the thing to play in something resembling "tune" (what is this "tune" thing I speak of?) you have to do some math.

Well. Anybody who has known me for any length of time knows that Algebra 2 was one of the worst experiences of my life, and I quickly and purposely forgot it all once I had passed the class and moved on with my education. Where and when, I often asked, was I ever going to use this knowledge again?

Fast forward to yesterday, and a few useful websites. One of those sites offers the following text:

If I want a pipe that plays an A-440 (that is, the note at 440 Hz, which happens to be an A), sound waves have to go around it once in 1/440 second. So, (2 x (length of pipe in m)) / (345 m / s) = (1 / 440) s. We can solve this equation algebraically to find that the length of pipe must be .392 m (39.2 cm).

Algebra? Heaven help me.

Heaven came in the form of yet another nifty website. (They've got practically everything on the net these days, don't they.) Somehow I managed to actually use those instructions to draft my own equation and plug it in, once I had figured out the part about sound waves traveling at 345 meters per second. And I found that for a pipe to play a D at 293.66 Hz, it needed to be 0.58741402 meters long, or about 23 1/8 inches for us English speakers. And lo and behold, when I cut the PVC pipe to that length and blew into it, aiming at a nifty tuner app, I got a D.

I then used the Flutomat to calculate the distances and hole sizes for a D-minor scale, drilled out the holes, and now I've got my first homemade flute.

Fine-grit sandpaper takes off the black printing as well as the shiny surface, so it looks just a little less like PVC at a distance, although the cap at the end kind of gives it away....

Silly me, I should have offset the G hole a bit. Yes, it is rather awkward to play. But it has an interesting sound.

Bonus feature. If you drop it on the floor, or even step on it, it won't break!



Want to hear what it sounds like?

I Was Driving, No Camera Handy.

So I couldn't take a picture, and you'll just have to take my word for it. For a couple of miles on the freeway, I followed a septic tank service truck. You know, the truck with the big tank on the back and the great big ol' hose. On the back of the tank, right under the name and phone number of the company, it said "Warning! This tank may contain political promises!" Honest. Really.

The Little Tank

That is how one of the San Diego Zoo bloggers referred to this baby bear, in the context of last week's veterinary examination.

The little tank is going to be a very big tank before we know it.

Why Not?

After all, they found Richard III under a parking lot. (Maybe.)

Michigan police skeptical they will find Hoffa's body under driveway

All Together Now, One, Two, Three....

Awwwwwww!

Twenty Days Old, 60 Seconds Of Unbearable Cuteness

The new baby in San Diego is already recognizable as a panda, and s/he is trying very, very hard to mobilize!



No, I don't know what that yellow stain in the corner is, since this camera does not broadcast in color.

11 Days Old Already

Might as well get used to it... this blog is likely to be wall-to-wall bears for a while.

YEP! SHE'S A MAMA AGAIN!

Bai Yun gave birth to her 6th cub Sunday afternoon. She is one of the oldest panda mothers ever at age nearly-21, and is now the most prolific panda mother in any breeding program outside of China. Congratulations to mama and papa, and cheers to the panda staff at the San Diego Zoo!

(Photo credit: The LA Times, via San Diego Zoo.)

YEP! SHE'S PREGGERS!

Expecting the pitty-pat of widdle cubby feetsies at any moment. Yay!

How Annoying.

Someone presumes to correct my grammar--and they're wrong! Case in point; the exceptions to the comma-between-doubled-word rule being "had had" and "that that." Changing "had had" to "had" or "has had" changes the meaning. Worse yet, "had, had" is COMPLETELY wrong. Wrongety-wrong-wrong-wrong. Look it up. I had to, so you can too.

Surely This Is In The Constitution.

As one of the mandated duties of the federal government. Right next to that wall of separation between church and state.

Live From San Diego

Mama bear Bai Yun from yesterday, having herself a snooze. She is on hopeful pregnancy watch, so cross all your fingers and toes for a new cubbie to be born later this year!

In The News Today

From today's Yahoo headlines:

You've got to be kidding me. Are there really people walking around loose that are this dumb? Wait... don't answer that.

The Fun Never Stops.

Anybody read in the financial news today about that big ol' merger that was announced in the medical transcription industry?

Yes, I will be involved in that. Thank you for asking.

Last time I went through a merger, I was part of the smaller company that got gobbled up by the big fish.

This time, it's the other way around. Last time's gobbler (for which I still work) will become the gobble-ee.

And even though the sale was announced today, it will not be final for 6 to 9 months, they told us, so nothing is supposed to change for at least 6 months. After that? All bets are off.

Oh, and the most fun? The announcement conference call was set for 9 a.m. . . . eastern time. Lovely consideration for the employees in other time zones (not). And they still didn't beat the press release. Facebook was hopping well before the conference began.

Yep. The fun never stops.

Way To Go, Yahoo News.

Nothing quite like telling the terrorists the best places for them to target. Uh huh.

No, I am not linking the news story, just in case there's a terrorist watching this space.

One Silly Bear

Captured live on the Pandacam just now... not-so-little-anymore Yun Zi at San Diego, taking a nap in a rather extraordinary position....

Neighbors.

Show an appalling lack of consideration, thumping around in the bedroom closet at 11:30 in the morning. Makes it hard for a girl to sleep on the job.

I'm just saying.

And The Highlight Was...

... borrowing a flute off a street musician and playing "God Bless America" at Ground Zero.

(In case you haven't read the post immediately below this one, this picture was taken in July of 2003.)