I Expect To Be Arrested.

For smart-aleckry on the census form.

Yeah, they can make me fill it out, but they can't make me play their stupid little ethnicity games.

On the "race" question I went all the way to the bottom, checked "other" and wrote in "human."

Expecting the jack-booted knuckle-dragging thugs to show up on my doorstep any old time....

But I'm pretty sure they really don't give a rat's rear end that I'm white beige because the only yes/no question had to do with whether I was some form of Hispanic.

And if there'd been room for an essay answer, I would have spewed about how it's unfair and misleading to lump all people of European ancestry under the "white" label because if you're going to go down that road, let's point out that those of us whose ancestors several hundred years back hail from northern Scotland (mine) have little in common with those who were born in Italy and emigrated to this country as young adults (my landlord and his wife), for instance. And yet, the gubbermint considers us all "white."

Can you tell I get really, really annoyed about this crazy Balkanization that I'm paying for via my tax dollars?

I am a human-American of light beige skin tones. So there.